Monday, August 21, 2006

Its been so loong...

Hi gals! It has been so long since i've updated. A lot of things have happened for the past month. Came back from chem engin camp and engin Oweek which just ended last last saturday so didn't really have much time to blog. SoooOoo sorry abt it gals n KYLIE WONG u better don't close down the blog okie? Its our onli form of contact lor... so we blog whenever we can la k? Anyway, sch for me has started last week. Wow... realli not used to it after 3 months of long break! Looking back, i have to admit that i have a rawking n happening 3 mths of fun! ( which explain why i finally fall sick when sch starts. *sniff sniff* )

my taiwan trip with my buddies... engin cam...CHESS camp.. Oweek... n meeting ups with frens i hardly get to see durin my sch term... i never get enough of it. =)

getting back...erm let me explain my previous post, the one regarding my bad day. actually, i broke up with siangyuan le, officially on 13th Aug. hope u guys aren't shock by this n the reason y i never update u all is becz we never meet up la! n i dun realli feel like blogging abt it at the point of time. The day when i last blog was the day i brought up the issue to siangyuan. He didn't reaali agree to it at first so this issue has been dragging on for a month le. It has been a tOrturous one mth for me, but the lucky thing is that i have my camps all these to distract me. So actually i have been avoiding the issue for the past mth.

and gals!! where are u all when i needed u all the most?? *sobz*

n the reason for my break up? actually all along i have been thinking about things and it juz occur to me that i have no feelings for him anymore. i think u all can guess from the way i talk about him. seriously, thruout the realtionship there r a lot of differences btw us n there was this period of time that we keep quarelling. i guess my feelings for him died down at that point of time. It took me a bit of time to realise that i can't realli see any future in our relationship n there is no point wasting both of our time so i initiated the break up.

He was very upset of cz n he keep asking me to give us a chance, but u all shld know my character. once i make this kind of impt decision, i know there is no turning back le. I don't like to leave a grey area in our relationship so i was very firm abt my decision at the point of time. i keep telling him no. I may sound very BITCHY like some of my frens commented but then i realli got no choice cz i dun want him to habour any hopes between us anymore. I reaalli dun want to hurt him at all. serious. i realise that when a relationship comes to an end, someone have to be the BAD GUY no matter whether he wants it or not. If there is no bad guy, there will be no clean break.

how am i feeling now? i dun know. but we are still frens lor.. he still sms me, i think he've not given up yet. anyway, it does feel weird to be single out of the sudden. weekends will be quite free for me from now onwards so gals.....DATE ME OUT PLEASE! haha... anyway, it does feel lonely at times, cz u know that u will be walking the journey alone now. n there is no someone there who will look out for u n share yr happiness n woes n do silly things with n for you. n there r times when images of the past juz flash thru my mind but then i know i can't regret all this cz i was the one who made the decision. so i try not to think abt it. but SUndays r esp hard cz last time after my organ lesson at PS he will always wait for me to have lunch. now when i come out from lesson, i know there is no one waiting for me now. its kind of sad. hopefully i'll get used to this feeling. n i hopefully i'll like my singlehood! no biggiE rite??

anyway single le. that makes four of us. haha so u all free jio me out ok? u all better take initiatives cz i'm the sad one now. bleah k now sch starts le, i think its time for me to get serious n realli study this sem cz i need to pull up my CAPs. horrible grades last sem, argh.... its me n books now! argh!!!


*sad ching aka lychee =( *
blogged @ 2:51 PM


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